The other day, one of my kids–previously afraid of slides–tugged my hand.
“Mama will you catch me? I am going to do this slide.”
She climbed to the top, and paused. I could see her thinking. Then she let go. It was a steep one, and I almost didn’t catch her before she hit the sand on her backside. But I did.
When I I set her own her feet, she didn’t even see me try to give her a high five. She was already headed for the ladder. Not with excitement or even enjoyment, but with a serious look of determination on her face.
“I’m going to do it again and again,” she said. After a while, she didn’t need me to catch her.
I wrote on Tuesday about working past fears. and already I’m seeing the truth of Steven Pressfield’s thoughts on fear. My fears are real, they are often rational, but if I get even a little bit past them, the blessing is there like leprechaun’s gold.
- I’m afraid to ask for help. But when I do, I find more authentic community.
- I’m afraid to admit how little I know. But when I do, I’m ready (finally) to learn.
- I’m afraid to loosen my standards. But when I do, I find freedom.
- I’m afraid to try something new. But when I do, I feel exhilarated.
- I’m afraid to look foolish. But when I do, I care less about what others think.
- I’m afraid to disappoint others. But when I do, I let God to be God and take myself out of the running.
- I’m afraid to admit my doubts and fears to God. But when I do, I rediscover his presence.
What are you afraid of today? Is there a baby step you could take–or a friend that could catch you if you try?
Image credit: Ken Bosma
Goals keep your expectations reasonable
Hmm I think we might be long lost somethings. One through six are all my biggest fears!
I’m kinda thinking we’re a mini tribe out there, because I keep having this conversation with people: “You mean, you’re afraid of that, too?” How crazy!”
What a relief to slide, slide, slide and find your feet. a dear friend just did a program to overcome fears, fears that had become walls, blocking out life. The change is amazing. Fear is truly the thing to fear.
It’s harder to let go of the mental angst tied up in relying on others. For me. It’s less predictable than the slide.
Oh, I hear you. Others’ expectations, others’ opinions, others’ needs, and our need for them. I find myself so paralyzed when it comes to asking for help–or even receiving it. I’m trying to learn how to mentor and collaborate with my daughters in their education–and how to seek out that kind of collaboration and mentoring myself.
I love and admire your daughter’s determination. Like you, I have many rational fears. But I have many irrational ones as well, and I sometimes find I’m not sure where the line is. Maybe it’s mothering? Or hormones? Or midlife? Or my genetic predisposition to risk avoidance? Whatever it is, I much prefer pretending my fears don’t exist rather than giving them any more time in the front of my brain. I probably need to work on that!
Yes–where is that line? And does labelling it (rational/irrational) help or hurt? Lately I’ve been trying to just accept these fears, and either choose to keep them for now or hold them up to the light and see if I can see through them.